For women in sports, as with all women, choosing a partner to go through life with is one of the most crucial choices we make. Settling down and starting a family doesn’t have to mean the end of a career.
One of the big questions that female athletes face is how to navigate settling down and starting a family alongside pursuing a sports career. PVL champion and Creamline Cool Smashers setter Jia De Guzman’s advice? Choose an empowering partner, and you won’t have to choose between your marriage and career.
Here’s an excerpt from our exclusive conversation on my podcast “Go Hard Girls,” which Jia De Guzman (née Morado) and I recorded for the InternatIonal Day of the Girl last October. I found myself smiling from ear to ear as I listened to her talking about her dynamic with her husband, Miguel De Guzman, and I have a feeling you will, too.
“When we met back in college, one thing that I made sure Miguel knew was I'm a very powerful woman that knows what she wants,” Jia shared. “I knew what I wanted to pursue and I was looking for a partner that was supportive of what I wanted to do. At the same time, I was very supportive of everything that he wanted to do.”
“He's an athlete himself. He used to play baseball and he's very athletic also. So he knows what we go through. He was also exposed to volleyball in college because he was the manager of [Ateneo’s] men's team.”
There’s an element of flipping the script here. In a sports industry where we’re used to hearing about basketball players and the women in their life who run the homes and take care of children, it’s refreshing to hear how Miguel takes care of their home, making sure that Jia has a warm meal to come home to after a hard day of training, or a difficult game.
Jia says she feels nourished, not just physically, but emotionally thanks to his words of encouragement at home. This in turn, translates to greater focus in training, and more motivation on the court.
In society in general, women face a lot of pressure to start families, and at the same time, there are many cultural biases that moms face. Filipinas are often expected to scale back their careers and prioritize those of their husbands. Rigid gender roles discourage men from helping out with housework, doubling the burden on working moms.
But Jia shows how, with a husband who supports her career wholeheartedly, she doesn’t have to choose between family and career.
“Eventually when I have my own family, I also want to inspire my children to be the same — passionate athletes as their parents are…Maybe there's also that chance that I get to play in front of my children. That’s one thing that I hope I can do, kasi I also want to show that mothers can also play at a very competitive level,” she shares. “There are a lot of athletes internationally from different sports who are playing at a very high level, even after giving birth. Like Serena [Williams] and even athletes who play women's volleyball in the Olympics.”
Jia also looks to other moms in Philippine volleyball who have continued to pursue their careers, like Aiza Maizo-Pontillas and Fille Cainglet-Cayetano: “People are starting to accept that, you know, women can still play even after giving birth. They can still play at a very high level. And that's one [goal] that I've set for myself. Hopefully I get the chance to.”
On the way to that journey, her empowering relationship with Miguel — one she calls “an equal partnership” — will be invaluable to Jia. “To have that kind of support system, more than my family, to have him and his family also supporting me in what I do, sobrang plus talaga sa buhay ko. It makes life a lot easier for me,” Jia says.
For women in sports, as with all women, choosing a partner to go through life with is one of the most crucial choices we make. Settling down and starting a family doesn’t have to mean the end of her career.
If, like Jia, she chooses one that supports her goals, cheers for her wins, and treats her with care and respect every day, it can be one of the most empowering choices she makes.